Calling the faithful city back to the faithful God


Right to Roam?

Right to Roam?

In the classic Peanuts cartoons, there’s a line I love about not needing a national children’s day because ‘every day is children’s day.’ To a poet every day is a poetry day but because poetry can be lost in the clamour of daily life we have an annual focal point for poetry, National Poetry Day, this year on September 28th.

Recently a friend talked to me about having the ‘right to roam’, figuratively speaking rather than the literal freedom of access to country walks for ramblers. This ‘freedom to roam’ idea made me think of William Blake’s youthful poem about loss of innocence and liberty, about being shut in a golden cage. The poem begins, ‘How sweet I roam’d from field to field.’ Tennyson’s 1832 poem, ‘The Lady of Shalott’, is also about being alive, seeming to have a gilded life garlanded with roses and pearls, yet in reality lacking freedom, existing in a half-life of shadows with ‘little joy’ or time ‘to sport or play.’

In the New Testament, we read of a counter-cultural life, life in all its fulness and of being set free to live a truly free life. I admit to sometimes choosing the seeming safety of a gilded cage over uncertain liberty. And yet, poetically in the Old Testament, God promises to look after his ‘sheep’, to lead them to lush pasture, free to roam mountain pleasures and with sufficient food, rest, safety, direction, and health.

So, ahead of National Poetry Day I’m off to my poet’s garret to do a bit more musing but I’m going to be careful not to spend too much time there lest I miss out on living. As the ever-sensible Jane Austen wrote, ‘too much poetry may be unsafe’, although I guess focussing on it once a year won’t hurt!

Embracing inconvenience!

Embracing inconvenience!

This week Team Wearing had the opportunity to host Kevin, Jackson and Uncle Ryan from the African Children’s Choir once again.

This was an unexpected return and on the face of it presented perhaps something of an inconvenience…. the juggling of cars, borrowing guest beds, Daisy moving bedrooms, a big Lidl’s shop, enlisting the help of Grandad for school runs……and yet what we discovered as a family was that this opportunity represented something that we often take for granted: Time.

In our world of pressures, it becomes so easy for us to go to work or go to school, to plan out our evenings and get into established routines… filling out each day with predictability.

However we have been reminded this past week that God often has other plans for us.

We have learnt that he gives us seemingly inconvenient opportunities, reminding us just how attached we are to our routines, and instead shows us how we should cherish every moment we have with those that we love.

For us, our routines and certainty make us effective people, but we have been reminded this week, that through embracing the inconvenient things God brings our way, we can be  truly blessed and now would do well to reflect on whether what we do each day with our time, is pleasing to God.

Life is precious because it is short and unpredictable.

Perhaps next time, you have an inconvenience come your way, something that means a bit of juggling of time and plans, you can thank God for everything he has already given you and embrace the unpredictability! Inconvenience might very well remind us of how blessed we really are, bring us true joy and even a new revelation of God, his awesomeness and his unfailing love.

Tonight our house is back to ‘normal’, the TV is on, homework is done, the dishwasher is on…. and all is predictable…. but it is terribly quiet and a little bit ’empty’.

Kevin and Jackson magnified the love of God in our home. Their sense of awe, wonder and fun… their warmth to us, and the childlike love in their hearts for the Father, has undoubtedly changed Team Wearing and will have a lasting impact on our lives.

Reflections on suffering

Reflections on suffering

I’ve been reflecting recently on my experience over this last winter, starting in October when I was diagnosed with acute leukaemia up to news of my remission several weeks ago. I’m indebted to Brian McLaren’s book Naked Spirituality for stimulating my thoughts on this subject of suffering. This has been a difficult time for me, especially after a couple of the chemo treatments when I was at my lowest, wondering what the future held and even whether I was going to come through.

It’s easy (and natural, I suppose) to ask the question ‘why’ when we go through tough times – but it’s not a very helpful question because there’s not a really satisfying answer. We know we live in a broken world where bad things still happen, so to ask ‘why me?’ is perhaps selfish. Perhaps we should ask instead ‘why not me?’

However, rather than looking for reasons for an experience like the one I’ve gone through, perhaps a better question is to ask ‘what good has come or will come out of this suffering?’ As Brian McLaren says: ‘Ultimately, when we suffer, what we need is not explanations or reasons but meaning’.

For me, the good that has come from my bad experience includes:

–  the sense of being surrounded by a loving fellowship and community that supported and upheld me in the most difficult days – and the opportunity given to so many to demonstrate that (as seen, I believe, by  others around me who are not believers). I’ve been so conscious of the prayers of so many, both locally and in different parts of the world;

–  the goodness of God experienced through the progress of modern medicine and treatments that means I am now in remission;

–  the good relationships I built up with nursing and medical staff in hospital (people I wouldn’t otherwise have met) and the way it has opened my eyes to their dedication, care and professionalism, working long hours in often difficult and unpleasant circumstances;

–  the way I can now empathize with others who are going through similar situations. For some people at least I can now say ‘I know what you’re going through’ and mean it – and hope that will be a comfort and bring hope to them.

None of us want to go through suffering of any kind but rather than being beaten by it, let’s look for the positives that come out of it – always in the knowledge of course that whatever happens God is there with us, understands what we’re going through and ultimately will bring complete healing and eternal  joy in his very presence.


Community, submission, transformation

Community, submission, transformation

I’m off on a cruise for a week. I’ve always said that they’d never get me on one of those huge white boats. However, I am submitting to my friend Hilary and to my husband Neil by joining them on a cruise. So, I have sacrificed my desire for green grass and isolated places with amazing views for a big white ship filled with hundreds of other people.  And what’s more, I am really excited about it! I am going to enjoy this, and not only when I find some grass, isolation and views when we dock!

God has been taking me on a journey recently, revisiting what submission is all about. I discover it is about not sticking up for ‘me’ but instead deciding to promote community. It is about putting relationship before getting my own way, even when I know I am right. It is about acknowledging, respecting and encouraging those people who are in leadership in my life, acting graciously rather than being the constant rebel who wants to cause trouble. It is about realising that even if their way is not perfect it can be better to go along with it for the greater good. It is about giving up my selfishness but not my integrity. It is about giving in with grace and love for the other, always knowing that I am a beloved child of God.

Oswald Chambers said the key to discipleship is to “become broken bread and poured-out wine in the hands of Jesus Christ for the sake of others.

When I am unsure of myself and seeking acceptance I cannot submit to others as I should. Instead I become critical and try to put forward what I think is right even when this damages community. When I am confident about who I am in God, I do not need praise from others. When I am sure about where he has placed me and what he wants me to do, I don’t need to be ‘heard’ or to be ‘recognised’. As I first seek God and to live humbly with Him, I am enabled to live humbly in community with others.

Jesus said “Whoever loses their life for my sake will find it.” We are called to submit to God so that He can create something beautiful: a transformed life and a transformed community.

Cross of Stability?

Cross of Stability?

“For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God.” (1 Cor 1 v18)

One of the highlights of my week is getting together with a bunch of other crazy people at 9am on Saturday morning in order to attend ‘MetaPwr’ – a hit-intensity fitness class led by Spencer from Faith Within Fitness. This class requires us to subject ourselves to a tough 20 minute workout, designed to build core muscles and improve overall fitness. In theory, it is the perfect way to start the weekend, especially if followed by coffee in Eden Coffee Shop!

A recent class was held in the main hall at St. Peter’s Baptist Church, a venue which always increases the workout intensity as the room is always too hot (for me!). However, one of my fellow victims remarked that he liked the venue, as looking at the wooden cross in the hall helped him to ‘remain stable’ during the exercises.

The cross – a source of stability? That was too interesting a thought to ignore!

A quick internet search confirms that considering the cross of Christ as a source of stability is not a new concept. For example, the Rev. Tomas Bissland, Rector of Hartley Maudytt and Chaplin to Lord Bexley in the 1830s, wrote a book claiming that the faithful preaching of ‘the cross’ was not only the ‘effectual means for conversion of the sinner’ but also the source of ‘stability of the church’. Whether the sinners he had in mind where those engaged in a such a pedestrian lifestyle that a Saturday morning high-intensity workout should have been the prescribed penance I do not know! However, just as with my workout friend, it is clear that the Rev. Bissland saw stability within the story of the cross.

All that considered, as I have thought again about the Easter story again, it has struck me how the cross of Christ is something which actually causes instability within what may otherwise be considered the ‘normal’ way of the world. As a result of Jesus’ sacrifice everything is turned upside down. Weakness is shown to be a source strength. Defeat becomes victory over death. Suffering leads to salvation. I think St. Paul picked up on this too, when he wrote to the Corinthians:

“Some demand signs and others look for wisdom, but we preach Christ crucified: a stumbling block to some and foolishness to others, but to those whom God has called, both Jews and Greeks, Christ the power of God and the wisdom of God.” (1 Cor 1 v22-24)

The cross disrupts those seeking stability by their own means, be that through religion or philosophical discussion and the pursuit of wisdom.

So, where does this leave me? When I look at the cross and consider all that Christ has done, I find myself questioning where my hope is placed and what I hold on to in order to make sense of everything. I find I am all too easily sucked in to believing all the promises of security offered by our current culture. The cross challenges me to test again what is the source and foundation of what I rely upon for stability.

One for All

One for All

“You’ve received a free upgrade.” The words every Spring Harvester longs to hear when they arrive at Butlins. This year, for the first time in five, we were welcomed with this sentence, upgraded from standard to silver! We knew it was going to be a great week!

This is the first year we attended with two children and this meant a very different experience for us. No more after hours entertainment or leisurely lie ins, nope, up at 7.00am for breakfast in time for Big Start and back home for 9.30pm. The time in between was spent trying to persuade small children to go to their groups, going on the funfair numerous times and enduring the never ending requests for ice cream. However, all this added up to the best year we’ve had so far. What an absolute privilege to holiday, worship and learn with thousands of Christians from across the world, as well as with our own children.

The theme for 2017 was Unity under the banner ‘One for All.’ We explored John 17 with Krish Kandiah, who opened up the truths of Jesus’ final prayer. The idea that most captured my imagination was this: what if we put aside our differences, what if we agree to disagree, what if we unite in Jesus, the one whom we all strive to serve and honour and glorify? What if we were so passionate about reaching people for Jesus, about sharing his love and plan for them, that we couldn’t care less about denominations, about ‘religion’ or about which church people choose to worship at? What if we put aside our differences and put our energy into building Christ-based relationships with those we sit next to on a Sunday morning, those who worship in a different building, those who are from a different class, country or culture?

Imagine if we could offer the world a ‘free upgrade’ on their view of Christianity, the church and of God. What an incredible difference we can make, if as individual Christians, we commit to being united!

Into That River We Dived

Into That River We Dived

It was a game changer for me. I can still hear the haunting ballads and bluesy harmonica even when no music is actually playing. The River album by Bruce Springsteen. Serendipity maybe, but I’d recently been revisiting the album when ‘The Boss’ turned up on BBC4 last Friday talking about the songs on the album followed by videos from the tour of 1980-81. No wonder the songs, especially the title track, had such impact on me as a nascent teenager, I thought as I watched Bruce reflecting on their meaning and subjects: of life, love, death, longing and regret. By employing that age-old metaphor of a river he evokes all that we have ever known of running water brought to us by the creative arts and our own experiences. What poignancy towards the end of the song, ‘Is a dream a lie if it don’t come true, or is it something worse that sends me down to the river, tho’ I know the river is dry…’

At St Peter’s we’ve been thinking about authenticity and fellowship, the drivers and the barriers. A while back I wrote a poem about a prime minister who wished he’d gone further with his reforms. He was asked what had stopped him. I went on then to think about pictures of a productive river from Ezekiel in the Old Testament. This draws my mind to descriptions which point us to ‘a river whose streams make glad the city of God’ and ‘a river with the tree of life for the healing of the nations’. Are you feeling that the river of life is running fast or slow for you, or does it feel like that river is all dried up?

Whether you are curious about where you can find living water or just want to find authentic fellowship and a group of close friends, in a world of shallow paddlers, why don’t you give us a try at SPBC? ‘Take the plunge (waist-deep), the water’s lovely!’

Life: don’t settle for arid when you can be awash.

Get up and go again

Get up and go again

I love skiing but I am not very good at it!

Today I fell quite hard, which leaves me sore.

Today I blame the snow, too much ice with lots of slush. At other times I might have blamed others – reckless skiers or snowboarders – or poor equipment, or poor light. Sadly the biggest factor was my poor technique or lack of concentration!

It is rather like life. Sometimes I fall quite hard and look around for who or what to blame, when really I am the main cause.

It reminded me of the song…You (God) lift me up when I fall down, all through the storm your love is the anchor, my hope is in you alone.

I did get up from my ski fall, and had another go. I fell again, re-enforced myself with Swiss chocolate and some water and did the run again. This time I didn’t fall even though the conditions were the same.

Life’s a bit like that. We fall over and it hurts and it is difficult to get up and go again. God wants to help us up, if we will let him. We just need to ask.

Accepting Adventure?

Accepting Adventure?

I enjoy walking……but am unaccustomed to really long walks. In mid October I and four others completed a walk along a peninsula near Albany, Western Australia. The weather was glorious, with an amazing variety of flowers and stunning views. The walk itself was varied and turned out to be something of an allegory on life. It included enjoyment, hard work, strenuous effort, companionship and care, fear and surprise.

After walking along Bald Head peninsula ridge we decided to return by way of a rather beautiful beach. Our guide, an experienced walker called John, knew the way and was familiar with the terrain. We made our way across rocks and through bushes, from time to time glimpsing huge turquoise waves crashing onto a white sand beach a long way below us. Thanks to recent erosion it was difficult to find a good path down. John led the way via a fairly vertical but negotiable bit of scrubland. By following his every step and words of guidance, by listening to his encouragement and refusing to think ‘I can’t do this’, we made it safely down to a sandy path which we could walk and slither and slide down, all the way to the beach (great fun!).

We set off again and I realised that we had two rocky headlands to negotiate. At one point I had to step across a deep crevice: John stepped across it first. I watched someone braver than me do it second and then with John showing me exactly where to put my hands and feet I finally made that step of faith! At other points the path was very narrow with a sheer drop on one side to the waves crashing below. I discovered that as long as I concentrated on John and simply copied what he was doing I could ignore my fear.

We made it around both headlands with some tedious stepping from rock to rock, keeping well away from the powerful waves. A steep climb took us back to the hilltop path and the final walk back to the car. Seven hours after we had set out. I now have lovely memories of beautiful scenery, caring friends and family and an adventure completed!

Lessons learned?

Always have an experienced guide!

Follow him closely and concentrate on copying him and doing exactly what he does.

Listen carefully and accept his guidance and encouragement!

And what I believe Jesus says to each of us:

“Follow me, I will be just in front of you, all you have to do is to stay close to me and copy what I do. I will lead you into some scary situations but I will never leave you alone. Listen to me, hear me telling you how well you are doing and how pleased I am with you. Stop looking at what might go wrong and listen to my encouragement. Don’t listen to your fears, focus on me and simply take the next step. Sometimes you will be able to see the way ahead, sometimes it will seem too difficult but you can trust me. Not only do I know the way, I am the way.”

Truths in Tension

Truths in Tension

It was great to see church and community united in candlelit celebration as we considered ‘Hope at Christmas’ through word, dance, and song.  A modern rendering of an ancient proverb says, ‘Hope postponed grieves the heart, but when a dream comes true, life is full and sweet.’ I think it’s evident that we hold truths in tension every day and manage to marry apparent dichotomies:  I can be an idealist yet still a realist, pragmatic yet perfectionist, made happy when listening to sad songs.  On a previous Sunday we heard about lament at advent and at Christmas we consider God coming as a child, first and second comings, death and life, joy and sorrow, a baby in a manger who points to the events of Easter. As we pin our hopes on various outcomes this year end I pray that our dreams come true, that ‘longing fulfilled is a tree of life’.  As the Victorian poet Christina Rossetti put it so well, ‘Love came down at Christmas’.  You just can’t beat Rossetti at Christmas (she also wrote In the Bleak Midwinter) but for my attempt at a contemporary take on the message of hope please keep reading…

Jesperanto  (he’s behind you…)

(Dickinson:) “Hope” is the thing with feathers – that perches in the soul…’

(Tutu:)  ‘Hope is being able to see that there is light despite all of the darkness.’

Saint Paul said: ‘Hope that is seen is no hope at all.’

Sentiments so earnest and high-minded, yes top-drawer reflections for sure,

So lofty, and I get lofty, but lofty’s in my head-space and just right now

I want hope in my heart-space, in my time of dis-grace when I feel out of place.

Lofty is heaven to earth, King’s College to my Tech., fine dining to

My KFC. Waitrose for Lidl, Aldi. Tatler not ‘What’s On TV’,

Film Noir, silent cinema to ‘I’m a Celebrity’ (please get me out of here!)

Financial Times over Farmers Weekly, more The Sixteen than East

Seventeen. Gown to Town, The Savoy not a plain boiled saveloy.

And I think my homeboy Job gets it, for keeping it real, says:

‘What strength do I have, that I should still hope?

What prospects that I should be patient? [keep going]

My days are swifter than a weaver’s shuttle and they

Come to an end without hope. Who can see any hope for me?

When I hoped for good, evil came; When I looked for light

then came darkness.’ All my splendour gone and buried.

A stand-off, a face-off when I needed a human face-on

Hands on, feet on, velvet-cheek-brushing-mine-on.

But the thing is, the King didn’t cling-on to divine loftiness

Gave it all up to be a slave and a slavering milk sop to boot,

Ivory tower spliced iced pavement in one loving nosedive

Top Trump bling became a hiker on a road we could reach him.

And Why?

To lift us up, to bring us life, to see through our veneers,

dry our very real tears, hold our hands, to see us through;

High Celestial hope no doubt but with – like us – skin on.

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